Love, Beth

Wow. It has been a while to say the least. Where did the time go? Oh, wait. As of a few weeks ago, time has completely stopped. Somehow tho, the sun keeps coming up. How does that happen? I try not to cry, but sometimes the tears just fall. People are afraid to ask if I am okay because the obvious answer is no. NO. NO. Definitely NOT OKAY. Today a sweet friend sent me a poem and another one brought dinner and many good friends send love on a daily basis, but something was different today. I felt my mom stronger today than I have since that day at the burial when she sent fire ants to eat my ankles because I refused to sit on the front row and stare at her pine box while our family pastor told me I would heal. Eventually.

Mom is talking loud ... and Daddy she misses you so deeply....

Love, Beth

I stand by your bed at night, I'm sorry that you weep
I speak to you softly, "I'm here, I haven't left you. I'm in your heart to keep"

I'm close to you in the mornings, in the stillness of the dawn
We sit together as we always have, I assure I'm not gone

I am with you at my grave, you tend it with such care
I want to reassure you I'm sitting next to you, not lying under there

You are so tired in your days, everything seems so hard
It deeply saddens me that you are forever scarred

But, please grieve me and then dry your eyes
I will always be near you, just as the sun is set to rise

Please remember that I am with you everyday
I can say to you with certainty, "I never went away"

And when the time is right for you to cross over to the other side
I will rush to you and meet you and for eternity we'll be tied

Heaven is for real, so much for you to see
But, for now be patient, live your journey, then come home and be with me

Rest in peace my beautiful mommy. You are so very missed...
~SOS~

ROUNDUP

Last weekend my hubby went to Wyoming with Wounded Warriors to attend a roundup. WW is an amazing program for our injured service men and women.  Hubby on a horse... on a ranch... with cattle... was a little unsettling to me, but there is no talking him out of anything to do with the Military. He is a stubborn Marine thru and thru and I knew he would get up on that horse with the warriors and attempt to drive no matter what I had to say about it.  I didn't hear much from him during the weekend, just a post on Facebook claiming, "damn horse got away from me!"  
Oh jeez, that can't be good.

When I talked to him on his way home, he informed me that he was thrown from an angry horse... a few cuts and bruises, broken toe... no big deal... not to worry... he saddled back up and finished the ride!  ookkkkkkaaayyyyyyy

A few hours later he came limping through the door. Could I get him an ice pack and something for the pain? It was all I could do not to laugh.

ME:  "Honey, why would you get on a horse when you don't know how to ride?"
HIM:  "I know how to ride! I have ridden plenty of horses!"
ME:   uh, huh... "when? where?"
HIM: "you know, over the years... at resorts and various places"
ME:  "and it didn't occur to you a ranch horse might be different than a resort horse??"
HIM: "Shut up Texas!!"
just sayin'...

Aside from the angry horse, he had some great stories to tell about his experience at the ranch and the amazing men he spent the weekend with.  He even walked away with a pretty cool buckle... even though he needed a little help attaching it to his belt....

~SOS~

UM, WOW

I just got my car back from the shop. It has been there for a month. Damn Texas roads are dark at night. The exit ramps should be lit up with some kind of reflectors. or a sign. a street lamp. something. A tree jumped out of nowhere. Nobody was hurt. The dog, a little shocked. Didn't much like the taste of dashboard. or windshield. However, the tree seriously liked the taste of my car. Grabbed a huge bite of the front quarter panel and drive shaft. and the license plate. yum. 13k dinner for tree. My perfect driving record now has a big red slash. blinking red lights: warning!
But this is not my story.

My baby sister is getting married in a few months and I went to the party store to get the decorations for her lingerie shower and bachelorette outing. Ohhh la laa. I walk out of the store in a good mood. oooo-eeee,  this is gonna be good.  

Holy. What the eff? MY CAR!?!?! There is a huge scratch along the passenger side. Seems a red car danced with my car and then took off. Asshole. Someone is gonna hear about this!

Hello!? non-emergency police? yes, someone hit my car and took off. I give the lady on the other end of the phone the gory details of how my newly painted car is in ruins. She assures me that someone is being dispatched as we speak directly to the scene of the crime. Thank you very much I say completely satisfied with myself. This situation is getting handled. I am, however annoyed pissed the car will be going back to the shop. grrrrrr

then .... ohhh shit. wait! um, ma'am....  ummm. wrong car. sorry. eeekkk!

I can feel the roll of her eyes as she hangs up on me. I look at the ground, pretend she is still there and say thank you, goodbye. There are a few people watching my tantrum and at this point I am not sure what to do. So, I gesture at the scratched door and mumble, "that sucks".  Then, I pull my baseball cap down over my eyes and haul my dumb ass across the parking lot to MY still beautiful, newly painted, non-scratched car.

Guess I wont be going back to that side of town again... EVER.
~SOS~

WEARIN HIS SIX-SHOOTER

Coming from Los Angeles, Punks is somewhat unaware of cowboys. Houston is packed full of them. Their ranches are somewhere out west and they are anxious to get back as soon as they take care of some business here in the city. We are working on her knowledge of Cowboys. Auntie K and Uncle Chris got her some pink boots for Christmas. Complete with a silver toe in case she really wants to get after it.

Punks and I went to the grocery store this morning.  "mama, mama, mama, oooooook" she points. There he was.  In true cowboy fashion.  Worn out Wranglers, sun faded shit kickers, Texas sized belt. He was missing only the lasso and the horse. He walked slowly past her, tipped his hat, a slight smile. She fell apart in giggles screaming "mamamamamama, mmeeeeee!"

And then he was gone. Through the sliding doors.
In search of whiskey, miss kitty, a place to hang his hat.

TURBULENCE

There are two types of turbulence. One kind is when the airplane drops twenty feet, everyone gasps and looks around to make sure the plane is still in tact. The other is flying with two very small children. 2 months and 25 months. We are moving to Florida. Pit stop in Texas to spend Christmas with my family. Hubby had to drive Mister (our 100 pound yellow lab).  So, I was on my own with the girls, two car seats, a stroller and enough luggage for three weeks in tow.

GRINCH

This year we are spending Christmas with my parents. My mom was just here about a month ago and Punks is still looking for her, in the bathtub, in the closet of the guest room as if I am hiding her somewhere. Punks will let out one of her high volume screams when she sees Nana again.  And we will see Papa who is the other half of Nana and thinks it hilarious to spoil the girls rotten as payback for me being a crazy wild child. 

The fall is my favorite time most wonderful time of the year and yet the kids' birthdays and Christmas Day quickly hit the top of the list as my least favorite. Your a mean one, Mr. Grinch. You really are a heel.  Why am I such a grinch?  your as cuddly as a cactus, your as charming as an eel. TOYS TOYS and MORE TOYS! And as all mom's of girls know, every damn thing is PINK. Punks' room already looks like barbie throw-up. you have all the tender sweetness of a seasick crocodile, Mr. Grinch.  PINK PINK everywhere. ugh. These toys make me crazy not because they make obnoxious noises or because when I trip over them I almost break my ankle or at the very least acquire a new bruise or even because they leave puncture wounds in my feet. nope  It is the packaging and assembly of these horrendous things. you're a bad banana with a greasy black peel.

Lets start with the plastic casing. It is stuck together so tight you need some sort of sharp object to get it open. My husband likes to use his pocket knife which he uses to cut everything from snacks to mail and oh yeah, Punks' umbilical cord when she was born.  And if you have had five a few glasses of wine, the sharp plastic almost always draws blood. When the casing is finally pried away from the toy, you see your daughter's face light up with excitement as she reaches for her PINK toy, doll, noise maker, whatever.  But wait, there is more. There are wires holding this toy to the plastic! Are you effin' kidding me? DAMN! What jack*ss came up with this packaging idea?

You hand the toy to your child. "MAMA, MAMA!" ear deafening volume "WHAT!?!" your a monster, Mr. Grinch. your heart's an empty hole. She hands me the pieces. oh dear lord, there is more. It has to be assembled.  you're a crooked dirty jockey and you drive a crooked hoss, Mr. Grinch. There are directions, twisting, tightening and snapping pieces together and finally it is complete. whew.  

running time... 25 minutes

And then.... along will come Papa with another present to unwrap, plucked from the toy mountain under the tree. he will have a devious smile on his face. the instigator. here we go. again. round two. grrr.  I will give him my most nastiest look. your heart is full of unwashed socks, your soul is full of gunk, Mr. Grinch.

"MAMA, whats wrong?" "Nothing! No more presents for you!"   The three words that best describe you are as follows, and I quote, stink, stank, stunk

 

where is that bottle of wine?
~SOS

TEXAS GIRL

TO ALL MY HOUSTONIANS OUT THERE

Although I don't live there anymore and probably never will again, I still feel a great love for the city where I grew up. We get to spend Christmas there this year with my whole famn damily. Here are some of my favorite things: